Unequally Yoked: Voting Solely Based on Policy Is Like Marrying a Person Just Because the Sex is Great
Imagine marrying a conniving woman or hate-filled man because the sex was amazing or the wealth and affection were overflowing.
Does character matter in who you marry or is it only about the sex?
If sex is your only gauge for marrying someone, then you're blindspots are making you vulnerable to exploitation. It doesn't mean you will always be exploited, but when you are, you won't be able to see or deal with it.
This is a useful parallel to voting for someone solely based on policy.
People regularly say Trump is selfish, saying and doing things that are harmful to people, but character doesn't matter, they say. They're voting because they prefer Trump's policies.
They're saying the sex is great, character doesn't matter. So what, if the candidate treats people terribly... they're in a relationship with them because the sex is great!
Unequally Yoked
In the New Testament, the Apostle Paul talks about being equally yoked in marriage. Here's the verse from 2 Corinthians 6:14.
"Do not be yoked together with those who do not believe. For what partnership is there between righteousness and lawlessness? Or what fellowship does light have with darkness?" - Paul, The Apostle
Kacie Bryant from Crossroads church summarizes the idea as follows.
"When the animals are not equally yoked, they are not working together to get the task done but working at odds with each other. If you don’t have the same beliefs, values, or even morals, you will be working against each other in your marriage."
I find this idea of equally yoked as a helpful idea because I see so many Christian Republicans unequally yoking themselves with the corruption of Trump and the Republican party. And they won't let go.
Let's transition this metaphor to the difference between core American values and party policies.
We can think of party policies like how a couple raises kids, where we live, and how we handle household responsibilities.
To choose a political leader based solely on policy and not vision and values (and the reality they create) is to be unequally yoked with them. As a Christian, to marry or vote for a lawless person is to be unequally yoked.
Equally yoked says that if you’re both Christians, and you differ on the “policies” it’s fundamentally compatible. The flip side is a couple where one is a Christian and the other is not. They are not equally yoked, but they agree on how to raise the kids, where to live, and how to handle household responsibilities.
As Americans, What Makes Us Equally Yoked? What Core Values Have We Forgotten?
This is the pivotal question. Here's where I'm at with the answer.
Fundamentally, the core story of America is freedom over tyranny. This is also a narrative extension of the Israelites being liberated from the Tyrannical Egyptian Pharoah and Christians being liberated from the tyranny of sin through Christ's work on the cross.
So, what makes America unique and effective at living out this freedom and overcoming tyranny? What makes our society special and powerful?
The other critical piece of this component is the miracle of our centuries-long tradition of a peaceful transfer of power between presidents based on honest election outcomes and a voluntary willingness to give up power (demonstrated by George Washington and in stark contrast to Trump's clinging to power in 2020).
In 2020, Trump attempted to dismantle the distribution of power and consolidate it into the presidency so he could overturn the election outcome and stay in power, all based on a lie.
Trump betrayed all of us Americans. It's a tough pill to swallow, so many of us are still in denial about it, but it will become clear over time.
This means any American is now unequally yoked with Donald Trump and much of the Republican Party that actively participated in and enabled Trump's actions. Many struggle with this tragedy, and as a result, double down instead of shedding their party loyalty.
Tyranny Will Effect Our Daily Lives
"If Trump wins, there may be some policy improvements and I've been so frustrated with Biden in so many ways, but I still have to say that the core constitutional question is primary." - Andrew Sullivan, Political Commentator, What I Got Wrong About Trump
If Trump is successful at consolidating power in another attempt in the future, damaging or destroying our free and fair elections, there will be negative consequences to our daily lives.
If you think inflation and the economy are bad now, it'll be magnitudes worse if America's democracy is dismantled (see my conversation with Sorayan Bravo about the economic collapse in Venezuela after the tyrannical takeover).
When tyranny takes over, the lies and corruption will spread and it'll affect the rights, privileges, and benefits we take for granted each day.
There is no protection of freedom of speech without the constitutionally-based distribution of power.
The democratic system requires a process to change laws. With a tyrannical leader, changes are arbitrary and directed by the leader as they will it. A corrupt and broken person will perpetuate toxicity across our lives.
Fixing it, even if the consequences end up being much less than the worst-case scenario, will be much more difficult and consequential than preventing it from ever having the opportunity to break down.
These are reasons why I, a lifelong Republican, am not equally yoked with Trump Republicans, even if I agree with some of their policies. The great sex is not worth shedding what I consider to be, the most important enduring principles of our country.
Whereas with the Democrats at this moment, I as an American am equally yoked, even when we disagree on policy, because Harris and Democratic leadership value and are committed to democracy, freedom, constitutional limitations, and an honest presidential outcome. These are core principles, that may not be the most urgent for most Americans, are essential for them all.
So, even though I may disagree with Democrats on where to eat dinner, metaphorically speaking, I know we're in alignment in what makes America great. These values are what we've taken for granted my entire life, and now that they are under threat, many Americans are struggling to see that which is slipping away.
Avoid Regrets By Acting Courageously Now
"What happened to so much of the country (during the civil rights era) is they couldn't sit there and leave it in a box anymore. They couldn't leave it in their categorization of black people in the south. What's going on here and and who am I gonna be, and where am I gonna come down on this? I talked to people right now in their 80s and I can't tell you how many elderly white people wish that they had told a different story during that time. But even that regret is changing, opening and knitting together a bigger more wise point of view at this stage of their life. - Keith Eigel, Trading Chaotic Confusion For Convicting Clarity — Accelerating Character Development
There are critical moments in America's history where enough good Americans did the right thing to champion freedom and truth. The more I learn about American history, it's quite a miracle how many incredible and flawed people stepped into the gap at pivotal moments to turn the page and move us forward in a better direction.
On the flip side, there have been many Americans who chose the opposite, enabling and advocating for horrors such as slavery and racial oppression.
Here's one such example, of a grandmother who was part of the Jan 6 storming of the capital. She now regrets her past actions and speaks out against Trump. She's changed the story she's telling.
e Republicans have convinced you that the Democrats want this to be a communist country and if Trump doesn't stand up and push back we're not going to have a nation, and that's his message all the time, and it's a big lie.
We all have regrets. Another example of one in this Trump era comes from Adam Kinzinger. Adam is a former Republican congressman who has lived out his virtues and fought for freedom against the tyranny and corruption of Trump and the Republican party, but it came after some regrets. Here's a summary of what Kinzinger said to about his regret and doing the right thing.
"We interviewed Adam Kinzinger and he said something really interesting to us which... we asked him, why did you vote against the first impeachment?
He said, look I was open to voting for it but I just was looking for a reason not to. It was easier for me to stay with my party and so I latched on to the criticism of the Democrats and how they handled it...and I let that be my excuse. In effect, [Kinzinger] was saying that for sticking with his party and he regrets it."
He had the opportunity to do the right thing and he didn't do it. And he regrets that choice. But, more opportunities arose and he began making the right choice.
And you and I have that choice before us now too.
We can keep accruing regrets and contributing to the problem or we can stop and move in a different and better direction.
As Kinzinger described, it's easy to hide under the cover of the other team is bad, which Pamela above told us was a repetitive lie from Trump.
It's not easy to be courageous and stand in the gap. Not everyone will have that courage or be ready, but if enough do, we'll topple the scales toward truth and freedom on a foundation of equally yoked values.
For me, this is a core layer of why I, as a lifelong Republican, have chosen to vote for Kamala Harris. There are many weird feelings and reservations I have, but those are all secondary things to what matters most.
Together, let's continue the tradition of those who came before us and elect leaders who will honor their oath and commitment to the Constitution.
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